Superman Returns is an interesting title to come across my desk. The movie that shares the same title, characters and whatnot, came out last summer, and here we are about to enter 2007. Still, mis-timing aside, this time-tested icon is brought to us by EA Tiburon and their long-time partner in crime, Electronic Arts. If many of you are surprised that EA’s prized sports developer crafted this game, you are not alone. And sadly, it shows that perhaps they should just stick to their mega-successful Madden, NASCAR and NCAA football titles.

Graphically, the sandbox interface will remind many of Hulk: Ultimate Destruction or Spider-Man 2 games, but with an interesting caveat… I thought I had hit a time warp when I first arrived in Metropolis. No, not in terms of the cityscape harkening back to a pre-modern style, or a literal wormhole opening to the Bizarro world, but in the fact the visuals looked like something akin to a late generation Playstation One game. Most notably, the buildings look like LEGO blocks, sharp, angular and without much detail. Also, what is up with the design of Metropolis? It oddly looks quite different from the movie version. Worse yet, the closer you get, the muddier the textures become. Superman himself is alright looking, with his distinctive red and blue tights, and he animates well too boot. His special attacks (like heat vision, gail-force breath) are also pretty decent, but they lack the real high-end effects seen in recent years, settling for grainy particle effects. The physics seem a tad off as well, but it’s hard to really tell because this is a super-hero game after all, and there can be some pretty zany effects. I noticed oddities mainly with picking up objects, there was a certain weight missing. I will say the lone cool feature was the sense of speed from “afterburning” with Superman’s flight ability. Soaring through the clouds and across rooftops was pretty neat. Too bad I had already done so in City of Heroes eons ago.

On the sound side of things, there is more of the same lackluster presentation. Shockingly absent is the instantly recognizable Superman theme, rising to that lovely build up penned by the immortal John Williams. Now the new and “improved” theme from the recent movie isn’t half bad, but I still miss that old classic from the Christopher Reeve era, may he rest in peace. The sound effects are your basic set of explosions, clunks, thunks and laser effects, nothing really notable here either. Lastly, the voice-acting doesn’t match the movie lines one bit - and this is with the original cast returning for their likeness and voice talent too! Yup, the creepy baldy Lex Luthor (Kevin Spacey), the man of steel himself (Brandon Routh), Kate Bosworth (Lois Lane… still not sure on this casting choice…) and Parker Posey (Kitty Kowalski) are on the docket. While Spacey is the best among the bunch, as a whole, they just can’t deliver, perhaps another case of the curse to movie-game translation (see my recent Eragon review for similar issues).

Superman Returns opens with our hero standing astride the streets of Metropolis, tasked with defending the city against a large array of meteorites raining from the sky above. It walks you through the subtleties of flight, your super powers and more. Ultimately, it was pretty forgettable. The various meteorites will shift from flaming to ice, making you change accordingly from heat vision, to icy cool breath - did you just pop a Mentos? You also can fly at supersonic speeds - both on ground and in the air - and you also have your hurricane scale bellows of air. But where is the X-Ray vision and super hearing? Too many concerns about a girl’s locker room fiasco in this family oriented game? It’s not like Rockstar made the game after all….

You basically set off in the city of Metropolis, in non-linear fashion, although flying into certain zones seemingly cues up new content and missions - all in an 80-square mile zone, which can be covered quite easily with your super speeds. Your main opponent is Metallo actually, not Lex Luthor like in the movie. Ok…. new storyline is always good I guess… His vast army of robotic henchmen will constantly plague the man of steel, almost to the point of ad nauseum. One of the more notable features is Superman has no health bar per se, only a Metropolis damage meter; the more destruction is wrought upon the city, the worse off you are, until finally nothing is left and you have to start over from where you left off. There is a stamina bar of sorts, so you can’t go crazy or you will be one weak hero sooner or later. You can also battle well-known DC Universe foes like Parasite and Bizzarro (the alter ego of our protagonist). Strangely, neither Luthor nor your gal pal Lois Lane make much of an impact on the gameplay, leaving you with the odd question of what movie Tiburon is actually portraying here…? All you have is an endless series of minions to battle, sprinkled with further forgettable bosses.

The fighting system expands a bit beyond just your ranged attacks. You can unlock more and more combos and powerful moves, such as uppercuts, airborne punches, supernovas and Earth-shattering slams - over 30 in all. Some of these combinations are kinda lengthy, up to 5-6 buttons may go into an attack, and add a little bit of diversity to the stale combat. Thankfully, the lock-on system is pretty smooth and allowed for some deadly circling of enemies below while blasting them with some shots of fire and ice.

Overall, the gameplay has a host of fundamental flaws, from moronic A.I., a patched together storyline featuring elements of comic book and movie lore, and tedious action. To top this all off, the game is really short, I’m talking 6-10 hours at the longest, and that is just plain unacceptable for a videogame in this day and age.

As I previously mentioned, right off the bat you are introduced to how to control Superman and his various powers in the opening sequence, while you battle asteroids bent on destroying your beloved Metropolis. This truly helps bring you up to speed with the interface, but the controls and U.I. aren’t terribly difficult in the first place. Throughout the game, as long as you remember the fundamentals of Superman - fly around using ranged attacks - you will conquer your enemies with ease. Occasionally, you may stumble against the first few boss types, but at least they present some challenge in this otherwise snoozer of a game.

Superman Returns controls alright for the most part, although juggling everything at first may take some getting used to; switching from heat to cold, to flying at super sonic speeds, all while locking onto enemies, is some multitasking for sure. Then you throw in the fairly lengthy fighting combos, and it can get a tad tricky. In terms of the camera system, it is pretty solid, staying behind Mr. Supes as he zips around the urban landscape. I was actually surprised this was one area that was reasonably error free, considering the package as a whole.

Ultimately, Superman Returns is another failed attempt at the movie to game crossover, with dated graphics, weak sauce voice-acting and gameplay that harkens back to late 90’s mediocrity. Perhaps fans of the film or DC comics may get a kick out of some of the characters and villains you come across, but this long-time comic fan just couldn’t get into this title. Your best bet is to just save up for DVD release, and keep your fingers crossed for a Superman game to finally do his legacy justice.